Wow….life has been rough lately. I can’t go into a lot of details here…..but I can say that I have had to lean on God WAY more than I have in a long time. Prayer has been my therapy….but somehow, I didn’t get what I asked for. I guess that God has other plans…so I will wait for Him to reveal them.
Why is it that even when you think you are humming right along, doing the “right things,” that you can come to a fork in the road that you never knew was there? Then, when you are trying to choose which way to take on the fork, the decision is made for you….and you have no choice. I’m there right now.
Families are supposed to stick together, through thick and thin….at least that’s what I was always taught…..and I’m pretty sure that’s God’s plan. Satan can be such a poop head! Now, I find myself trying to figure out how to live peacefully and content, with just me and my daughter. I feel God’s hand on us, and I know that He will guide our steps, but I am just SO in shock over this turn. I SOOOO wanted to take the other way at the fork. However, for him, there was no other way….he chose….and I have no choice.
As I sit here in my office typing, I am looking out the window and watching y daughter and her friend lying on the dock of our pond, waiting for their other friends to arrive so they can go mudding on the 4-wheelers and swimming in the pond. The horses are walking in front of my window, stretching their necks over the fence, trying to get to the taller grass. I hear bees buzzing and birds chirping right outside the window. This is my solice….watching God’s creation and the children. This will keep my heart joyful…but it’s so easy to become ungrateful and to forget about all of these beautiful things.
God, please help me to be ever mindful of you and all that you have given me, even when times are tough. I look forward to the life you have in store for me and Shelby.
Wow….what a bunch of rambling, huh?? You know me….I type…and don’t use the backspace…..so my heart just flows out through my fingers….uncensored……and usually a little nuts.